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Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Too Small -- A Rant

Until this point in my pregnancy I've been locked away and hidden from the world. Aside from my blog, and the good friends that came to visit me, no one saw me pregnant. That all changed this weekend! I had a chance to spend time by a pool, hang out with my friend Rosie in Pasadena, and spend time at my parent's house. During my excursions, strangers were talking to me left and right, all asking "Are you pregnant?" I was delighted to stick out my belly and say, "Yes."

The inevitable question would follow: "How far along are you?"

Still beaming, I would say, "Six and half months."

Everything would go sour after that because no matter who I talked to, every single person said the same thing, "You're too small!"

I'm not kidding people. You think I'm exagerating, but I'm not - every single person said this.

The worst point came yesterday when my neighbor, who has had seven children of her own, said to me bluntly, "This isn't good. You're too small. Something's wrong. You need to eat more."

Maybe it's the pregnancy hormones, but I just got mad. I wanted to shout to the world, "Leave me alone! Every woman's body is different. Every pregnancy is different. Who are you to make me feel like there's something wrong with my pregnant body?" The doctor says I'm doing fine.

I'm worried enough about the health of this baby, and telling me that there's something wrong with my body, when the doctor has clearly told me I'm healthy, only makes me mad!

Can't a girl get a break? I thought pregnancy was the one time when we were let off the hook. Sadly, it seems like no matter what weight, no matter what stage of life, a woman's body is never free from scrutiny!

10 Comments:

Blogger Amy said...

well said. it is amazing how many rude things people feel free to say to pregnant women! I think you look GREAT :)

7:42 PM  
Blogger Kristi Fields said...

Christin - regardless of what other say, you are beautiful, both inside and out! You are absolutely glowing in your "belly pictures" and it's so neat to share this experience with you, even if I am in Indiana. :)
By the way - Lori (Weaver) Hutchins is scheduled to have her baby girl tomorrow! Yay for all my childhood friends having babies! :)

7:40 AM  
Blogger Amanda said...

Okay, Tin, here are my top ten resposes to these questions from rude (and in my opinion jealous) people:

1. "My doctor's not worried and neither am I."
2. "Yes, this beautiful bone structure and glorious metabolism tend to evoke a jealous response."
3. "How much do you weigh?"
4. "Pregnant? I'm not pregnant."
5. "Too bad you can't give me your spare tire to even us out."
6. "Ah yes, it's not fair. I get a killer body and an easier labor."
7. "No speak English."
8. "Have you seen the movie 'Speed?' Yeah, well if I get over ____ pounds I'll blow up."
9. Tell them how far along you are in weeks and walk away while they are still doing the math.
10. "Actually, I'm having twins." (This will really throw them for a loop...and while it's entirely false, it might be a bit fun for you.)

Love ya,

Mandy

11:08 AM  
Blogger Paula, Bobby, Rebekah, and Sarah said...

Christin,
My mom is 5 foot 6 and 120 pounds, maybe. When she was pregnant with me, she was sick all the time, didn't even show or wear any maternity clothes till 6 months, and weighed less right after having me than before she got pregnant. :~) As long as you're doing what you're supposed to do, you're fine. A healthy amount of weight to gain is 25-30 pounds. The people that gain 50+ may be not doing something healthy, or their body is just different. I was not very big with my first until 6 months, but got bigger a lot quicker with #2. Don't listen to the critics!! They probably don't remember that they were smaller with baby #1.

3:15 PM  
Blogger Jim and Jaena said...

*You look great - period.
*I like Amanda's list.
*I actually "measured small" with both of mine - both were healthy. You have a small build, so one would assume you would not have a giant baby. (I mean, who really wants to give birth to a 10 pound baby...anyone???)
*If the doctor says you're fine, ignore them or purchase ear plugs. ;)
*Bigger isn't always better; sometimes it's just bigger.

6:53 PM  
Blogger Josh said...

Hm...strange. I've thought you looked too fat for at least a month now.

12:22 PM  
Blogger Christin said...

Josh - Hilarious! Dwayne has been calling me "Jumbo" for at least that long. ;-)

11:41 AM  
Blogger Dave Ward said...

Christin,

Holly got this stuff a lot...I agree with Mando...they are jealous. :) Now they just look at her and say "how can you still look like that after two kids?" Tough on them, I get it. They have been helping their ego out in a too focused on image world by believing that they can't fit the mold because they had kids. Fine...sorry you get that shtuff.

Excited that you are up and around!

4:16 AM  
Blogger iwuqueen said...

Hey, Christin, this is Rachael (Kelly) Johnston from IWU. I've been reading your blog regularly because I'm almost 20 weeks pregnant, and I enjoy hearing about your experiences. I had to come back and re-read this entry tonight because people have also commented on my size, including a woman tonight at my church. I inevitably have people who say things like, "You're pregnant? Well, you aren't showing" or "You're really small." At this point, I am only halfway through my pregnancy ... I have a LOT of time to grow, and such thoughtless comments make me feel extremely defensive about my pregnancy. Just wanted to let you know you aren't alone. Those comments really irritate me, too.

7:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi Christin, this is Tracey Meeks. I hope this is how I contact you. I love all your words about pregnancy, so true they are. Im on my third baby and im 27 weeks and those symtoms are just amplfied this time around. I was told today that the baby is pushing on my bladder and that was causing my panic about my water breaking. Oh, about your leg cramps I was told during my second pregnancy that eating more foods with potasium and magnesium will help with the cramping in the legs. So eat a bananna everyday. I have not had one yet this preganacy!!!!and watch the type of shoes. Well I have a qestion for you. We are moving to Los Angeles sometime in the begging to early summer 2008. Where is a nice place to live? nice schools? ect ect.
Tracey Meeks
tdalfred73@aol.com or tdmeeks73@sbcglobal.net

1:11 PM  

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