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Friday, April 02, 2010


I feel all ramped up.

Something is going to happen but I don't know what. I'm waiting for something to break - but there's nothing immediate on the horizon. Perhaps it's just all the excitement of these last few weeks. So many things coming together, moving forward, sweeping me up like Wordsworth's howling winds in, "The World is Too Much With Us, Late and Soon."

"The winds that will be howling at all hours/ and are up-gathered now like sleeping flowers."

I feel up-gathered, like many petals spinning toward the eye of heaven.

Next week Dwayne has his on-campus interview out of state. Who knows what will happen. We could know in two weeks where we're moving. Or we could be waiting for another handful of months.

I was realizing just yesterday, that my incessant need to know seems to have subsided. Somewhere between writing about it to you all, and praying about it, and thinking about it - I made peace with the uncertainty of our future.

I stopped trying to visualize just where we will be and realized that I could bend, and flex.

At some point I realize that this spiral toward the sky is going to break, and my many members will float back down to the earth, but that's in the future, that's a moment in time I can not hold. So be it. Right now, I'm following the ride.


Blogger tfritter said...

What a beautiful image, I'm smiling to hear this state of your heart. Send a little serenity my way, will you?



8:10 PM  
Blogger Anne Canright said...

This is beautifully felt and expressed. I, too, feel like things are breaking at the moment (not in an especially good way), and the image you paint here is comforting.

11:22 AM  

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